Who Do You Send Wedding Thank You Cards To? (A Flowchart)

a flowchart for who to send thank you cards to
Simple, right?

This post contains affiliate links and/or links to my own products. I never recommend anything I don’t love or wouldn’t use myself.

The wedding and honeymoon is over. You’re settling into your new life as a married couple. But you have one more thing left to do on your to-do list! Send those thank you cards.

Who do you send thank you cards to?

It’s very simple who to send thank you cards to.

You send wedding thank you cards to everyone who attended your wedding or helped out in a significant way. You need to send a thank you card even if the guest didn’t give you a gift.

You’ll see some other answers on the Internet that suggest you only need to send thank you cards to people who gave you a gift for your wedding. But gratitude should also be extended to anyone who helped with your wedding planning and anyone who made the effort to attend.

Here’s why: by only including those who gave you a physical gift you’re discounting the people who may have helped plan but were unable to financially afford to give you a gift, or to people who were unable to attend but are significant sources of support in your lives.

Should the people who are meaningful in your life give you a wedding gift regardless of finances and ability to attend? Absolutely. But sometimes being an emotionally-stable adult means being the bigger person and extending gratitude for the ways they were able to help and support your marriage.

The emphasis on the gift in this equation doesn’t sit right with me.

Do you send thank you cards to wedding vendors?

You do not need to send thank you cards to all of your wedding vendors. But you might consider sending a personalized thank you card or email to anyone who had a larger role in your wedding. More importantly, make sure you give your wedding vendors a positive review.

Here’s what I mean by someone who had a larger role. The planner who helped you from start to finish and worked all day to make your day seamless, the stationery designer who went above and beyond to overnight a package to you when you forgot the place cards at home, the photographer who stepped up last minute to replace the one who got sick? Anyone who went above and beyond should really get a card or email from you that you appreciate their efforts.

And even better than a thank you is a sincere review. Leave the review on whatever platform you found them on or platform they are looking for reviews. Make a list as you go of all of the vendors you worked with. Then dedicate one evening or weekend afternoon to reviewing them all. It helps their small business get future customers so much and all vendors appreciate the effort.

Do you send a thank you card to your wedding officiant?

If your wedding officiant is someone you know personally or asked to get certified in order to play that role in your wedding, they deserve a personalized thank you card and a small gift. If it’s someone you paid to officiate and that’s their profession, you don’t need to send them a thank you card or gift.

Need more information about wedding officiants? Try this post.

bright orange floral thank you card on a grey fabric background
Orange Bright Floral Thank You Card – Available from Loud Bride on Etsy

Do you send a thank you card to your wedding planner or coordinator?

Your wedding planner and/or day of coordinator absolutely deserves a personal thank you card. As well as a small gift as a token of your appreciation. Whether they helped plan your wedding from top to bottom or just busted their butt on the day of setting up all of your decorations and coordinating the schedule, they had outsize roles in making your day special. It’s important to let them know you were grateful to have their help. And to let others know how they made your day wonderful.

If you did not appreciate the job they did and something major went wrong on your big day that was their fault, you should still give them honest feedback on your experience. Depending on what the mishap was you may or may not decide to include this note in your review.

Do you send thank you cards to your wedding party?

Your wedding party should get personalized thank you cards. It’s also customary for them to get a small gift. You can give the gift on your wedding day or at the rehearsal dinner. The gift is to thank them for being a part of your big day.

Like the others mentioned above, your wedding party went out of their way to be involved in events leading up to your wedding, get ready with you, be a part of your ceremony, and may have even helped with planning or set up. Show them you appreciate their help with kind words and a token of your appreciation.

Do you need to send personalized thank you cards?

You may have noticed that I said a personalized thank you note. It’s important that you genuinely thank each person or family for their individual contribution to your wedding.

You need to send a personalized thank you card that directly addresses the role they played in your wedding, the contribution they made or what they mean to you.

Now, that doesn’t mean you need to come up with a completely new thank you card note from scratch. You can use a template or a mix of templates to fill in the blanks with what they personally did or mean to you. That way each person gets an individualized note tailored to them. But you don’t need to reinvent the wheel each time.

Here are some great templates for you to start with.

What needs to be included in a wedding thank you card?

The building blocks of a successful wedding thank you card include the person’s or family’s name, an acknowledgement of what they gave you, and an anecdote from the evening or sincere note that you’re looking forward to seeing them again soon.

It doesn’t need to be terribly long. But it should be personalized and specific in thanking them for their contribution. Even if that contribution was only attendance or other non-monetary gift, you can thank them for their support of your marriage or for sharing in your special day.

Where to buy affordable thank you cards?

I’m a stationery designer outside of running this website so I have a lot of experience when it comes to sourcing and printing stationery such as thank you cards. The site with the best options, good printing and customer service, and affordable prices is Zazzle. Take a look at my favorite thank you card designs here.


I hope you’re feeling better prepared to write your thank you cards after reading this article! If you’re reading this article before your wedding is over, make sure you check out my other resources for wedding planning and join the free wedding planning club over email or Facebook.


Jaime is the owner of Loud Bride and Coast Designs LLC. She got married in 2017 in Geneseo, NY and designed her own wedding invitations and programs for the occasion. Now, she designs bespoke wedding stationery and affordable templates for other couples. She lives in New York city with her husband and two children.

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